For those of you who don’t bother with the nation’s favourite waste of time – otherwise known as the social networking website Facebook! - this is a compilation of my ‘status updates’ on Facebook from the last few weeks.

 

Given that I don’t seem to ever find the time these days to update my blog here on www.softbulletin.co.uk, this will give those of you who are sufficiently interested in my antics a vague insight into what I’ve been up to lately…

 

Sunday 28th June 2009

Rich has had another enjoyable day watching Glasto from the comfort of his sofa! Best band of the weekend so far, by a mile, have been the mighty Spinal Tap! The genius of their performance has however made Rich even more irked about the fact that he had a ticket to go and see them this coming Tuesday - only to be forced to give it away, due to his school having arranged its end-of-year show for the same evening...

 

Monday 29th June 2009

Rich  is sad that the weekend is over. As well as spending much of it enjoying the coverage of Glastonbury, him and Em also planted some vegetable seeds in his garden! Just three or four months of careful nurturing and they should have their own courgettes!

 

Tuesday 30^th June 2009

Rich  is currently reflecting on the downsides of having a pet parrot, having had his precious sleep disturbed this morning by by Doris screeching the house down from first light at 4am or thereabouts!

 

Wednesday 1^st July 2009

Rich  will be spending part of the day today at work teaching the children who are going to be his new class for next year! It's going to feel strange only having 19 children, having had 31 this year and 34 the year before that..!

 

Thursday 2^nd July 2009

Rich  has a guilty confession to make! Despite the fact that he always moans whenever his girlfriend insists on putting it on the telly, he's actually secretly getting quite into the weekly drama of 'Britain's Next Top Model' on Living TV! Don't tell her though, anyone..!

 

Friday 3^rd July 2009

Rich  had a very surreal experience yesterday - namely, he got home from work at about 8.30pm to find his housemate Emilie in the thick of hosting a vintage clothing party! A bit like a Tupperware party, only with vintage clothes and lots of ladies sauntering around trying on different outfits and wine a-flowing! It was ace!

 

Saturday 4^th July 2009

Rich  is rejoicing in the weekendishness of it all, having had a stupidly hectic week at work. This included two evenings spent looking after his class, as they did their bit for an all-singing all-dancing performance put on to mark the imminent end of Jesse Boot Primary School after an illustrious 74 years! Suffice to say, Rich never wants to hear 'Puppet on a Fucking String' by Sandie Shaw ever again!

 

Sunday 5^th July 2009

Rich  is enjoying the weekend. Yesterday involved getting mildly wrecked at an amusing house party, and also a trip to Broadway cinema for a screening of the film 'Hillsborough', with a Q&A afterwards with writer Jimmy McGovern. Interesting stuff. Today meanwhile he's off to a friend's house to drink Pimms and watch the Wimbledon men's final!

 

Monday 6^th July 2009

Rich  is dreading work this week. What with his school having had it's big end-of-year performance last week it felt very much like a grand finale - so it's going to feel like a big anti-climax this week trying to get the kids settled back down for an ordinary week of humdrum work. Still, just nine days to go now til summer break-up..!

 

Tuesday 7^th July 2009

Rich  has begun to suffer the dire consequences of adding his girlfriend to his car insurance as a named driver. No, she hasn't crashed it or anything like that. However, upon delving in the glove box the other day, he stumbled upon one of life's true horrors - yes, a Westlife CD!

 

Wednesday 8^th July 2009

Rich  is feeling grouchy, as Miss Brown has been doing an 'on-call' duty for her job - and his much-needed beauty sleep was disturbed when her phone inevitably rang in the middle of the night! He's proud of Miss Brown though for her ability to deal with emergency situations within literally seconds of waking up...

 

Thursday 9^th July 2009

Rich  is proud of the Year Three kids at his school, who this week ran their own market stall as a mini enterprise project... and made a profit of nearly £200! Hopefully the kids will all remember Mr Fisher in 20 years' time when they turn out to be the Alan Sugars of the future! Excitingly, we're using the cash to sponsor five different endangered animals through the WWF...

 

Friday 10^th July 2009

Rich  plans to take his class outside today and do P.E. all morning! This was actually the plan LAST Friday, only it hammered down with rain. Hopefully thiis won't happen again, as last week the only thing that could stop kids rioting over the adverse weather was to let them play Singstar all morning instead. Surprisingly, no parents have yet complained about Mr Fisher subjecting them to his rendition of 'Ace of Spades'!

 

Saturday 11^th July 2009

Rich  is looking forward today to catching up with his dear pal Ed, who he drove to Mongolia with last summer. Seems scarcely believable, but next weekend it'll actually be a year since Rich and Ed departed on their silly 8,000 mile caper in their battered Peugeot 106...

 

Sunday 12^th July 2009

Rich  , after the Westlife debacle a few days ago, has this weekend experienced the altogether more positive side of his girlfriend passing her driving test and being able to borrow his car. Yes, he can now go out and get absolutely ratarsed, and get her to pick him up! Cheers darlin'..!

 

Monday 13^th July 2009

Rich  is still chortling about the Julian Clary stand-up gig he went to last night! Uproariously funny for many reasons - not least the fact that the gang of people that Rich went with included his a] Rich's mate John, who actually really looks like Julian Clary; and b] Rich's Gran, who had to have it explained to her what rimming entails!

 

Tuesday 14^th July 2009

Rich  discovered the other day that Ed Balls, the Government's big cheese for education, is fully aware of some of the shenanigan's that have been going on in Rich's classroom recently - and has made it known that he approves heartily of Mr Fisher's 'creative' approach to teaching. As to how Rich became aware of this , it's a bit of a long story! Amusing though...

 

Wednesday 15^th July 2009

Rich  is hoping his esteemed sibling makes a swift recovery, what with him having become poorly this week with Labyrinthitis. Given the fixation that Rich and Al have long had with the film The Labyrinth, the fact that Al has fallen foul of this particular illness ought to be mildly hilarious - however, it's an absolute bitch of a condition. Get well soon Al...

 

Thursday 16^th July 2009

Rich  is limbering up for the last day of school before the big break up for the summer holidays! He's going to miss some of his class, and suspects some of the kids feel the same about him. Though this would probably only be because of Mr Fisher's ability to climb on the roof and get their footballs down, rather than his actual abilities as a teacher..!

 

Friday 17^th July 2009

Rich  is now just one inset day away from six weeks of freedom! Final day of term with the kids yesterday was fun. As an end-of-year treat, class 11 were allowed to watch the video of Mr Fisher's infamous appearance on The Weakest Link back in 2001! In return, Mr Fisher received an absolute mountain of presents - though he STILL hasn't had his first 'Great Teacher' mug!

 

Saturday 18^th July 2009

Rich  is well impressed with his housemate Emilie, who's been doing a spot of modelling lately.. and yesterday appeared in a fashion spread in the Nottingham Evening Post, showing off various examples of 'festival chic' and generally looking fab! Hopefully she won't now start throwing big supermodel-style diva strops all the time, a la Naomi Campbell..!

 

Sunday 19^th July 2009

Rich  is reaching breaking point with the veritable mountain of chocolate that he's been grazing on since Thursday, from when all of his class brought him end of year presents. Enough is enough - he's beginning to feel like he's been violated by a box of Celebrations!

 

Monday 20^th July 2009

Rich  has had an excellent weekend, what with it having involved the new Harry Potter film, a cheese 'n' wine evening, and a load of mechanical dinosaurs! Alas though today is where he confronts the less glamorous side of his humble profession. Yes, he's off into his school armed with a pair of pliers to spend the day pulling staples out the wall of the classroom he's about to vacate. Fun fun fun..!